I feel homesick for a home that I have never known, a home that has been taken away from me before I could be part of it.
‘You know, Arthur, I’ve been thinking about what professor Bird said the other day. What if you feel you belong to a place that doesn’t exist? A place beyond imagination, rooted only in a feeling, a notion unexplainable, undefinable.’ I looked at Prue and savoured her words, looking into her eyes and at her lips as they moved with hesitation.
‘There is a feeling of peace in me at the realisation of having no need to belong to anywhere terrestrial, having no need to belong, at all. Maybe the only place where you truly feel you belong is in someone else’s heart.’ I said smiling at Prue while feeling a sudden deep loss and loneliness. ‘For sometimes you feel you belong to a certain place, briefly but not endlessly, and you know that place will soon change but the feeling in your heart does not.’
We always hide something inside for no one ever reveals every thought, every feeling without hiding behind a mask, a shield that protects from people’s judgements and assumptions. We have a chamber within that nobody is allowed to enter. A place that doesn’t physically exist and yet eternally present behind walls of silence. If you can find that place and if you can linger within its limits without fear, shame or unease then maybe you have come home. A home that you can take with you wherever you go.